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Bulwer-Lytton Fiction Contest 2009 results


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After years of submissions that courted absolutely no recognition, I can now proudly say that I have been counted among the giants of bad fiction. This morning, I learned that I had received a Miscellaneous Dishonorable Mention in the 2009 Bulwer-Lytton Fiction Contest for the following...

They said that his writing was rich in metaphor . . . not the type of rich that one likens with the amassing of great wealth, but rather the richness that one might associate with a Pot Pourri pasta meal available at Spaghetti Factory, featuring a mix of Brown Butter and Mizithra Cheese, Meat, Clam, and Marinara sauces - yes, that's how rich his metaphors were! (for John Updike-RIP)

John Drew

Santa Clarita, CA

I may not of won, but it's just an honor to be named among the disgraced.

Oh, yeah... here's the winner...

"Folks say that if you listen real close at the height of the full moon, when the wind is blowin' off Nantucket Sound from the nor' east and the dogs are howlin' for no earthly reason, you can hear the awful screams of the crew of the "Ellie May," a sturdy whaler Captained by John McTavish; for it was on just such a night when the rum was flowin' and, Davey Jones be damned, big John brought his men on deck for the first of several screaming contests."

David McKenzie

Federal Way, WA

Formerly Baal_T'shuvah

"Everyone has the right to make an ass out of themselves. You just can't let the world judge you too much." - Maude 
Harold and Maude
 

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Congratulations... I think...

"I feel a nostalgia for an age yet to come..."
Opus, Twitter, Facebook

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After years of submissions that courted absolutely no recognition, I can now proudly say that I have been counted among the giants of bad fiction. This morning, I learned that I had received a Miscellaneous Dishonorable Mention in the 2009 Bulwer-Lytton Fiction Contest for the following...

It's a dishonor to virtually know you! ;)

There is this difference between the growth of some human beings and that of others: in the one case it is a continuous dying, in the other a continuous resurrection. (George MacDonald, The Princess and Curdie)

Isn't narrative structure enough of an ideology for art? (Greg Wright)

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  • 11 months later...

The 2010 results.

Winner...

For the first month of Ricardo and Felicity's affair, they greeted one another at every stolen rendezvous with a kiss--a lengthy, ravenous kiss, Ricardo lapping and sucking at Felicity's mouth as if she were a giant cage-mounted water bottle and he were the world's thirstiest gerbil.

Molly Ringle

Seattle, WA

Formerly Baal_T'shuvah

"Everyone has the right to make an ass out of themselves. You just can't let the world judge you too much." - Maude 
Harold and Maude
 

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