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Guest Russell Lucas

Unfunny Things Seen on Church Signs

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Well, yeah! NEVER, I mean NEVER admit that you are an overgrown kid. Even if she is on to you. biggrinjester.gif

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Okey doke, driving back home from San Antonio, on Highway 281, in some small town:

FREE TRIP TO HEAVEN

DETAILS INSIDE

groooooooaaaaaaan.

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Yeah, there was another link to this in the prehistoric element of this thread.

NOW! With handy dandy REFRIDGERATOR MAGNET KIT! Links to books of more derivative drivel (how many use alliteration?).

I should talk. My church has a huge banner facing Comerica Park that says "Pray Here for the Lions and Tigers!". It works, as an usher I can attest to the odd fan wandering in for precisely that purpose in the Fall.

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I should talk. My church has a huge banner facing Comerica Park that says "Pray Here for the Lions and Tigers!". It works, as an usher I can attest to the odd fan wandering in for precisely that purpose in the Fall.

An occasional fan wandering in or a bizarre fan wondering in. (As if Lion and Tiger fans aren't odd to start with.)

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An occasional fan wandering in or a bizarre fan wondering in.  (As if Lion and Tiger fans aren't odd to start with.)

HEY! I agree with you about Tigers fans. We Lions fans are sports/SM freaks.

Occasional sincere fan. Sincere about the prayer for the team. Some who were brought up Catholic have been confused as to the paucity of Hail Marys in the BCP, though.

We get written up all the time in local media, particularly for the prayer service before the first Sunday afternoon Tiger game of the season. The Rector has been interviewed on CNN, FoxNews, and ESPN too.

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I also just noticed you said "in the Fall". How long has it been since the Tigers needed prayers in the Fall?

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I also just noticed you said "in the Fall".  How long has it been since the Tigers needed prayers in the Fall?

Specifically, 1983 and 1986. A sportscaster back then coined the term, "Bless You Boys" and he famously took back the blessing when they stumbled in late September. If you remember '84, they needed little prayer at all, going wire to wire in the lead.

I've only encountered the wandering prayer warriors in the Fall. The church is famous for organised prayer in the Spring.

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here's one:

RECIEPT FOR SALVATION:

YOU : $ FREE

JESUS : $ DEATH

****

i may have added the dollar signs.. i can't completely remember..

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'nother one:

WE HAVE BETTER SUNDAYS THAN BASKIN-ROBBINS..

i almost broke my neck trying to re-read that one to "get it"..

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Lurker here... great thread and I had to get in on it.

There is a small Lutheran church down the street that is trying to be hip for some reason. Two weeks ago the sign read:

"Who's Your Daddy?"

This struck me as wrong on so many levels.

:blink:

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Near my house on a church sign:

"Lent is Spring Training for Christians"

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How about TONIGHT: SARA ZARR! (Come help Jeffrey Overstreet set up chairs for her reading!)

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The Life magazine newspaper insert for this week has pics of various signs. A couple of the sayings are stolen from the messages from God billboards from a few years back. Others shown:

Shiloh AME Zion Church, Statesville, NC: Looking for a lifeguard? Ours walks on water

Gethsemane Baptist Church, Nashville, TN: Wal Mart isnt [sic] the only saving place in town

Bidgeton Bible Church, Bridgeton, MO: Swallow your pride, it contains no calories

Long Hill Baptist Church: Trumbull, CT: Heaven is a cool place

Christain Assembly Ministries, Stewartsville, NJ: Give your troubles to God, he's up all night anyway

Trinity Lutheran Church, San Diego, CA: Don't wait for six strong me to take you to church

Bel-Air Assembly of God, Glendale, AZ: ATM inside: Atonement-Truth-Mercy

First Baptist Church of Montana, Helena, MT: sign broken - message inside this sunday

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The Life magazine newspaper insert for this week has pics of various signs. A couple of the sayings are stolen from the messages from God billboards from a few years back. Others shown:

Shiloh AME Zion Church, Statesville, NC: Looking for a lifeguard? Ours walks on water

Gethsemane Baptist Church, Nashville, TN: Wal Mart isnt [sic] the only saving place in town

Bidgeton Bible Church, Bridgeton, MO: Swallow your pride, it contains no calories

Long Hill Baptist Church: Trumbull, CT: Heaven is a cool place

Christain Assembly Ministries, Stewartsville, NJ: Give your troubles to God, he's up all night anyway

Trinity Lutheran Church, San Diego, CA: Don't wait for six strong me to take you to church

Bel-Air Assembly of God, Glendale, AZ: ATM inside: Atonement-Truth-Mercy

First Baptist Church of Montana, Helena, MT: sign broken - message inside this sunday

I live right down the street from a Baptist church that has used almost everyone of these.

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I live right down the street from a Baptist church that has used almost everyone of these.

I'm not surprised. I've seen books full of suggestions. I just wish that The Disco Baptist Church was still around. There used to be an unincorporated jurisdiction on M-53 about halfway from Detroit to the tip of the "Thumb" called Disco. Had a little church right on the highway.

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I just wish that The Disco Baptist Church was still around. There used to be an unincorporated jurisdiction on M-53 about halfway from Detroit to the tip of the "Thumb" called Disco. Had a little church right on the highway.

Heh. Well, there's a little town in Central Washington called Zillah, and Church of God - Zillah is always good for a chuckle.

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Two of those I actually smiled at

Give your troubles to God, he's up all night anyway (perhaps that's my inner insomniac that liked it)

Sign broken - message inside this Sunday (that just amused me).

Nardis

There was a church near my house that used to have signs back in the early 80s and they did used to amuse me (I was about 10 though so, y'know). Sadly those signs have been done to death now (so much so that I'm too embarrassed to even share them), but at the time they were quite groundbreaking.

Matt

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Sign broken - message inside this Sunday

I recently saw this message on the local church I use as my gauge for church sign messages. As I drove past all I could think of was, "Apparently the sign isn't broken."

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"Thumb" called Disco. Had a little church right on the highway.

Heh. Well, there's a little town in Central Washington called Zillah, and Church of God - Zillah is always good for a chuckle.

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