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Over at my blog (Unexposed Granite) I have a weekly Limerick Contest that has turned into quite an event. And this week is our TENTH contest, so I thought I'd post a TOP TEN LIMERICKS, thus far. But I'd like you all to help me.

Look at the following limericks (the best 15 or so picked by me). PICK A FIRST, SECOND AND THIRD PLACE in your opinion and reply with your picks. Just give me something like First - A, Second - F, Third - C - or if you don't want to rank them just pick three favs and I'll give equal points to all three. I've included the topics that spawned these limericks, but you don't need to give me winners for each topic, just the overall best ones.

Thanks!

On the topic of Christmas Movies (Specifically, Jack Frost, Jingle All The Way, It

Edited by DanBuck
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Got to reject out of hand anything that doesn't follow the meter.

Silent No More: A unsolicited contribution.

A blog called Unexposed Granite

Sought the best limericks on the planet.

If the meter was iffy

They were writ in a jiffy

As a goof, like the blogger who ran it.

“I write because I don’t know what I think until I read what I say.” — Flannery O'Connor

Writing at the new Decent Films | Follow me on Twitter and Facebook

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Got to reject out of hand anything that doesn't follow the meter.

Silent No More: A unsolicited contribution.

A blog called Unexposed Granite

Sought the best limericks on the planet.

If the meter was iffy

They were writ in a jiffy

As a goof, like the blogger who ran it.

Nice.

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Well, now we know who wrote D. Feeling a little defensive, SDG?

In the last line, "Bod and Blood" instead of "Body and Blood" would've done the trick...

P.S. Of course Baptists would use grape juice, not wine. And does transubstantiation happen if you don't believe in it? :P

Edited by mrmando

Let's Carl the whole thing Orff!

Do you know the deep dark secret of the avatars?

It's big. It's fat. It's Greek.

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No one who has voted (yet) has posted any of the above limericks. And meter... meh. If it matters to you go ahead and consider it. It apparently matters to one of my regulars, all three of mando's votes were posted by the same guy. But I say, if the joke is worth bending the rule, bend the rule. If it bends its funny, if it breaks...

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No one who has voted (yet) has posted any of the above limericks.

That doesn't rule out Steven, unless he voted privately.

And meter... meh. If it matters to you go ahead and consider it. It apparently matters to one of my regulars, all three of mando's votes were posted by the same guy. But I say, if the joke is worth bending the rule, bend the rule. If it bends its funny, if it breaks...

This is a limerick competition, and anything that breaks the meter is by definition not a limerick.

Let's Carl the whole thing Orff!

Do you know the deep dark secret of the avatars?

It's big. It's fat. It's Greek.

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Mando: FWIW, my prior post is my first-ever attempt (successful or otherwise) at a limerick, at least to my memory. (I did once write a Chaucer-inspired fabliau, in high school, that was metrically far more egregious than any attempted limerick Dan has posted.)

Dan: Glad you liked it. I must admit I was hoping for one of your analytical critiques, but of course it was unsolicited and uncompetitive so expectations were low. :)

“I write because I don’t know what I think until I read what I say.” — Flannery O'Connor

Writing at the new Decent Films | Follow me on Twitter and Facebook

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